How do we talk to our children about America’s
history, and present problems with racism?
One things for certain: The answer depends on who
your kids are and what they need right now.
Dr. Jeff Lee has written on the website Seattle’sChild, “If your children
aren’t white, talking about racism isn’t just any talk, it’s The Talk. You’ve
been thinking about it since they were born. How do you tell them that some
people will fear them, hate them, hurt them — because of the color of their
hair and skin, or the shape of their eyes? If your kids are Black, especially
if they’re boys, you’re wondering how to tell them not to walk through certain
white neighborhoods, not to wear a hoodie after dark, not to run or reach into
their pockets when the police are there.”
If your kids are white, it’s a different talk. “How
do you help them understand privilege, institutionalized racism and implicit
bias? How do you tell them that they are part owners in a legacy of oppression
and violence that began long before they were born?” Dr. Lee continues. “Some
parents wonder if they should talk about race at all.
He goes on to stress that race, the way our culture
defines it, has no scientific basis and is arbitrary. Nevertheless, it is
serious because it effects lives, as do other human constructs including
nationality, “So yes, we need to talk about racism. It’s a moral issue, just
like lying and cheating and stealing — a critical piece of any child’s
education about right and wrong.
READ MORE: We can bring racial equity to our schools. It requires work.
Dr. Lee suggests that one take care NOT to overload
your child, and to work with their growing sense of “us” versus “them.” And to
look for real ways of expanding their sense of community.
In a broadcast on NPR’s All Things Considered, the focus was broadened to include petitions throughout the country in
support of creating anti-racist education. Travis Bristol, an assistant
professor of education at the University of California at Berkeley, was heard
saying that for students to receive an anti-racist education, teachers need
better training and students need more diverse teachers.
And at The Hill, three academics who
specialize in the teaching of racism — David Chae of Auburn University,
Leoandra Onnie Rogers at Northwestern University, and Tiffany Yip of Fordham
University – have pointed out how, “among white respondents, 73 percent said
their parents or caregivers ‘never’ or ‘rarely’ talked with them about racial
differences, and 65 percent said their families ‘never’ or ‘rarely’ talked to
them about racism.
“White children learn from their parents’ silence.
Children may view differences that are more often talked about, such as those
around gender, as being important. They may interpret the dearth of
conversations on race to mean that it is less important, doesn’t matter, or
should be ignored,” The Hill piece concludes. “We found that those who had conversations
about racism with their parents while growing up had a greater awareness of
white racial privilege and institutional racism. Perhaps even more telling — of
those who were parented about racism at least ‘on occasion,’ 91 percent had
discussions about racism with their own children... Open dialogue about racism
can be part of a larger comprehensive, intergenerational and societal movement
to eliminate racism and its consequences. These conversations are not about instilling
white guilt, but rather providing children with the tools to become strong
anti-racist partners.”