This
doesn’t have anything to do with parenting, really, so I wondered if this would
be better suited under my next selfie on Instagram. Then I remembered that I’m
not an influencer, nor a high-schooler, and that I should stick with what I
know. Plus, when’s the last time I posted
a selfie on Instagram…?
What
I do know is that self-confidence has always been something I’ve struggled
with. I’ve battled through depression, anxiety, issues with my self-image, and
two different eating disorders. I made it through all of this, and never
realized my worth or strength until it was almost too late. I survived
premature-delivery and a stroke and then I realized that I’m not worthless. I
saw what I was capable of on the inside, and though I still struggle most days
with what I see in the mirror, a healthy inner self-image helps with what I see
of myself. I’m a work in progress, the rest will come, but I wanted to share
with you what I’ve learned so far.
You will see your worth when your
inner circle is full of positive, motivational, and genuine people.
As someone who tries to see the best in everyone, there’s been a fair share of
toxic relationships in my life throughout the years. I’ve been taken advantage
of, picked on and had my emotions preyed upon, until I decided that I’d had
enough. It’s true what they (whoever they
are) say: quality over quantity.
Find your person or people and hang on to them. Surround yourself with people
who have characteristics that you wish you had. No matter who it is or how long
they’ve been a part of your life, you are not required to maintain one-sided
relationships, friendships that don’t make you happy, or any other toxic
connections. When your life is full of encouragement, love, and kind people who
have your best interest at heart, you can’t help but love yourself more, too.
Realize that the parts of you are
beautiful as they are.
I say this as someone who has had every hair style and color over the years,
but it’s true. Okay, so my hair is naturally blonde and I prefer it red, but do
you know how long I straightened the curls in my hair because I thought they
were ugly? My whole life, up until last year, I flat-ironed my hair every day.
I color my hair because I think its fun and I like to change up my look. I
straightened my hair because I thought I was hideous – all of the “pretty
girls” have straight hair. One day, call it laziness or having to care for
another human being or simply lack of caring, I wore my naturally curly hair in
public. Of all the hours I spent covering up my natural hair, how many times
had someone complimented my hair? None. But this one day, people were shocked
to see that my hair was curly. People told me it was beautiful, and it helped
my realize that it was. I never looked back and have so much more appreciation
of my hair as is, no matter the color. You can apply this philosophy to all
parts of you: your hair, makeup routine, weight, etc. It’s likely that the
parts of you that you are insecure about, someone else envies. It took me far
too long to realize that this is actually true.
RELATED: Beauty and fitness hacks to make you feel and look your best!
When you care about what you put in
and on your body, it shows.
As much as it
isn’t fair, you can’t survive on just pizza and milkshakes. You need to take
care of your body and appreciate all it does! Take a multivitamin, drink water,
have an annual physical, create and follow a skin care regimen, go to the
dentist, eat healthily most of the
time, read labels, and use products that are good for the planet because
they’re better for you, too. Don’t do it to lose weight, but to take care of
you because there’s only one you and you deserve to be the best version of
yourself that you can be. You need to stick around for a long time because the
universe needs you!
RELATED: Take time for self-care!
I think
you’re awesome. I think we’re all pretty amazing, actually, and I need you (yes, you) to realize your worth
right this second. No more negative self-talk. No more blaming yourself for the
actions of others. No more hatred of yourself or your body. As your friend, I’m
holding you accountable because I care about you.
________________________________________________________________
Underestimated Strength is a collection of posts all about our journey through life as we navigate preemie parenting after the NICU. You can read my posts here every Tuesday! Also, feel free to follow me on Instagram, where I speak freely about our story and advocacy.
Do you have any questions, comments or topic suggestions? Contact me via email: kristina.mulligan.blogs@gmail.com!
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Aug 6, 2020
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Aug 6, 2020
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Aug 6, 2020
Please join us in the movement!
Oct 1, 2019
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Sep 23, 2019
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Sep 10, 2019
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Sep 3, 2019
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Aug 27, 2019
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Aug 20, 2019
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Aug 13, 2019
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Aug 6, 2019
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Jul 30, 2019
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Jul 23, 2019
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Jul 16, 2019
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Jul 9, 2019
You’re sorry that this life that we never asked for is the one that we have. But I’m not sorry.
Jul 2, 2019
My intent for the month of July is to “be present,” but I want to make this my top bucket list item for the entire summer.
Jun 25, 2019
I know that this is what he needs, so I have no regrets, but as a mom, I feel lesser than.
Jun 18, 2019
Here some things that you should know, being in the support system of a family with a preemie.
Jun 11, 2019
I see you. I’ve been there. I see you, your patience, gentleness, and strength, and sometimes it helps to know that you are not alone.
May 28, 2019
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May 21, 2019
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May 14, 2019
Have you gotten caught up in the competition of motherhood?
May 7, 2019
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Apr 30, 2019
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Apr 23, 2019
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Apr 16, 2019
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Apr 9, 2019
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Apr 2, 2019
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Mar 26, 2019
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Mar 19, 2019
With premature birth being a huge concern in this country, it’s important to spread knowledge and awareness. Can the entertainment industry help with this?
Mar 12, 2019
As a new mom, I didn’t know what to expect, but I knew this wasn’t “normal.” When you don't know what to do, where can you seek help?
Mar 5, 2019
In what ways can prematurity change your parenting? For me, preemie life has lasted long beyond leaving the NICU.
Feb 26, 2019
How can you include self-care into your life without it feeling like work?
Feb 19, 2019
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Feb 12, 2019
How can the stages of grief apply to the NICU experience?
Feb 5, 2019
The words that we choose are more important to children than we realize. How can vocabulary be changed to create a more positive environment?
Jan 29, 2019
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Jan 22, 2019
I'm sharing my personal experience of what it's like as a mother who does double-duty with work and parenting all day.
Jan 15, 2019
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Jan 8, 2019
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Jan 1, 2019
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Dec 25, 2018
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Dec 18, 2018
This year, I organized a Twelve Days of Christmas Crafting Extravaganza for Flynn. Each activity is sensory focused but is also so fun and, of course, holiday-themed.
Dec 11, 2018
After being admitted to the hospital at 27-weeks pregnant with a sudden and severe case of preeclampsia, Kristina's pregnancy went from amazing to scary. At 28-weeks, she gave birth to her son Flynn via emergency c-section. This is Flynn's story.