It’s a trait of mine that some people find “unrealistic” and “annoying”, but as the wise Princess Poppy says, “Hey, I know it's not all cupcakes and rainbows, but I'd rather go through life thinking that it mostly is instead of being like you. You don't sing, you don't dance. So grey all the time!” Yes, I just quoted Trolls. Yes, I’ve seen it more than the average person. No, I’m not always with my kid when I watch it. Anyway, I don’t base my life around a character from a children’s movie - though I probably could, given my vast knowledge of animated films - but when I first saw Trolls shortly after Flynn was born, I’d never felt more properly represented in a film. Sometimes, I think the world needs a bit more Princess Poppy - people to be the light shining in the dark, showing everyone the beauty that life has to give.
I’ve always been more of a “glass half-full” type of person. During the roughest times of my life, like our battle with infertility or the days our son spent in the NICU, my glass would crack and sometimes shatter. I picked up the pieces, glued them back together, and continued life as “glass half-full.” Of course I struggle. I am human, after all. But I feel deep down that my experiences have shaped me to live each day with gratitude. Knowing what it’s like to be on the other side, with little hope, odds stacked against us, my heart breaking, eyes filled with tears, and lungs gasping for air, I am so appreciative of the life that I have been given. In spite of the challenges that our family has and will face, I am grateful.
In times where you want to scream in frustration and rip your hair out, take a deep breath and remember the alternatives. Living with conscious gratitude can sometimes make all the
difference.
RELATED: Help your kids keep a gratitude journal
When I’ve heard “mommy” 458 times in the last five minutes and all I need to do is finish this one email, I remember the times that we weren’t sure if we would ever hear Flynn’s sweet voice. We weren’t sure if he would ever come home. We weren’t sure he would ever speak. I take a deep breath and remind myself how grateful I should be to have his calls for me sounding through our house. I am thankful.
Through the tantrums of refusing to eat fruit for breakfast, but insisting on pasta instead. I know this will pass. I take a deep breath. I flashback to not long ago to the swallow studies and conversations about tube-feeding. Now, he eats. Not only that, but he expresses a desire to eat a specific food. I am thankful.
RELATED: 6 ways to get your kids to eat healthy
As I’m cleaning up the toys in the living room again after stepping on yet another Lego, I take a deep breath. I mentally flip through memories of the countless hours Flynn’s spent learning the “simple” things, things that others may take for granted like building with blocks or pushing a toy car. I remember the days where I had no messes to pick up. I am thankful.
It’s not a cure all. It doesn’t work all of the time. I’m not saying that anything that you do isn’t difficult. Just try not to let moments of frustration be any more than that: fleeting points of time that don’t eclipse the amazing things that life truly does have to offer. There are a lot more cupcakes and rainbows out there if you look hard enough. I promise.
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Underestimated Strength is a collection of posts all about our journey through life as we navigate preemie parenting after the NICU. You can read my posts here every Tuesday! Also, feel free to follow me on Instagram, where I speak freely about our story and advocacy.
Do you have any questions, comments or topic suggestions? Contact me via email: kristina.mulligan.blogs@gmail.com!
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