If
we constantly urge our kids “Be careful!”, we send the message that we don't
trust them and that they should be worried about doing something that extends
beyond their usual comfort zone. Sometimes a skinned knee or bruised shoulder
is an acceptable cost of stretching themselves, and we don't necessarily have
to intervene as they figure out their own limits. After all, part of our job as
parents is encouraging kids to develop skills through exploration and discovery.
On
ModernMom.com, blogger and education consultant Stephanie Trzaska offers ideas
on creating opportunities for what she calls “risky play,” situations where
young children can learn about the world around them without parental
interference. For instance:
- When
your child is first learning to walk and wants to venture away from your
supporting hands, don't always hover and grab, even if it means an occasional
harmless fall.
- Set
up safe areas to practice climbing and balancing, where a fall won't cause
injury.
- Let
your kids get wet and dirty. The clean-up is more work for you, but it's worth
it.
- Allow
them to play with real tools and utensils, not just plastic toys, so they can
learn to gauge weight and size. If something breaks, they'll also learn to help
clean up.
Benefits
of this kind of play include:
- Cognitive,
emotional, mental, and physical challenges that contribute to brain development
- An
understanding of cause and effect
- Improved
balance and coordination
- Resilience
and problem-solving for meeting challenges
If
it feels scary to give your child more freedom to explore, take small steps in
that direction. Try replacing the words “Be careful” with something like “Make
sure your body feels safe.” Remember that the goal is not for them to get hurt
but to gain self-confidence and independence. As Trzaska asks, “Do you learn
more when you’ve done something all on your own, albeit with some mistakes, or
do you learn more when someone does it for you and it turns out perfectly?”
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